Asking Why

I have bursts of inspiration; I can feel fit and healthy and on the right track one day and then the next day, I can feel 30lbs heavier and completely out of control! I have been getting this a lot recently. I need structure to function!
We are coming up to the end of term and I definitely need a change of scenery. Once you get out of a certain routine, a way of eating, or just let something slip, I find that it all can go to pieces, and a big change is needed to get back on track. My diet for the past couple of weeks has been very hit and miss. I have had perfect Paleo days, and then I have found myself gorging on Maoam's and chugging Diet Coke. Why do I do this? It isn't even that I like the taste of these things all that much. In fact, I have now found that fizzy drinks completely mess up my insides. This may get a bit personal but after drinking a can of diet coke, I have to run to the toilet. Anything with aspartame or stevia or any other brand of artificial sweetener is not welcomed in my body!
I have been trying to answer the question of 'Why?' these past few days. Reasons I have come up with:

• Stress- I am very close to finishing my degree so I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. Dissertation, revision, exams, money, jobs, careers, visas, moving house....
• Convenience- the crappiest excuse. I hate hate hate doing something because it is the most convenient. It becomes even worse when I hear myself justifying the chocolate because I am conveniently feeling stress. This is NOT good.
• Boredom- I love Paleo food. Love it. But there are times when I can't even look at a spinach leaf without wanting to barf. For some reason, I just get massive aversion to a certain food group! This leads me to feel annoyed with my situation, or angry that a friend can gorge on pizza and I can't. It is funny though that when I do feel this, I never act upon it when it comes to my meals. I haven't eaten any bread, pasta, or any other grain/legume/bean food concoction. No, when this happens, I snack and snack and snack on 'Paleo-ish' foods. For example, today my lunch consisted of 50g of Vegetable Crisps, a handful of blueberries, and no less than 10(!) chocolate dipped dates!! Why did I need 10? 2 would have been plenty. None of these foods, except the fruit, are really paleo. They are the more paleo options than say regular crisps, or an actual chocolate bar, yes, but it is definitely cheating.

Last night I made a Paleo dinner for me and my best friend. She has had to listen to me rattle on about Paleo this, Whole30 that for a couple of years now. I have tried to convert her; numerous articles infiltrate our facebook messages, Whole30 books end up on her desk. She appreciates where I am coming from, but she says she loves grains too much! Doing this dinner wasn't an attempt to have her cross over to the meat-and-veg lovers side; she loves all food, it was more a way for me to share what I eat with friends.
I made Juli's, from PaleOMG, pork tacos, and Michelle's, from Nom Nom Paleo, Chocolate pots de creme. YUMMY.
They went down a treat! Definitely will be making those again!
Finding new recipes does get you a bit more focused and renews your faith in the lifestyle. Hopefully when I go home for 5 weeks on Saturday, I will be more focused and more positive.
Lifting heavy weights also helps...I'll try and write a bit about my workout ways soon.
 

Grrrreat Granola

This week has been a mix of successes and failures.
Failure- Ate far too much chocolate with a friend while hiding from all the loved up couples on Valentine's Day and watching various Nathan Fillion films. I love him.
Success- Got a really good plan set up for my dissertation. I now know what I am doing!
Failure- I dropped my toothbrush in the toilet this morning. Fished it out, washed it, about to put it in my mouth when I had a change of heart! I need a new toothbrush.
Success- Made a Ratatouille from my new Paleo Slow Cooker recipe book. Delicioso.
Failure- Got lost on campus, at midnight, trying to get to the bus stop. I have been at this University since 2009.
Success- Managed to up my weights quite significantly in the gym. In particular my triceps and chest press. Woohooo!

I'm finding it hard to stay on track with the eating side of things. I keep reaching for 10p sweets or Lindor chocolate eggs. Eugh Easter candy. I have decided to come up with a list of foods that are 'Worth It' and 'Not Worth It' to help me stay on plan and not feel guilty. For example, artificial crap like haribo sweets are definitely NOT worth it. I don't even really like them! They are just an instant sweetness to pop in your mouth aimlessly. A square or two of dark chocolate with some sea salt is worth it. I'll keep working on it and give you a peek at my list once i'm done.

Tried another new recipe today...Pumpkin Paleo Granola which I found on the fabulous PaleOMG website that I religiously follow. Juli is hilarious and so down to earth! Go check out her blog. You won't regret it. I wanted something a bit different for breakfast that wasn't focused on spinach and eggs in various ways. I am a bit dubious as to whether it will keep me satisfied as there is no protein in it but I shall give it a go. I can always have a side of boiled eggs or something!
Here is my finished product:

Crunchy, pumpkiny, thanksgivingy, lovely. Great with coconut milk too!